Monday, July 20, 2015

I Literally Hate Satan



Hey family,

I have some really sad news. 

All week we were visiting Francisco and Amada. We went every day to make sure they were ready for their baptism. They were so excited. They asked us to help them plant a tree in their garden so they could always remember us even after we were gone. We went Wednesday morning to plant the tree and we were talking about the temple and how in one year they will be able to go. We left feeling so happy and excited. I truly came to love them and the change we saw in them was truly miraculous. 

On Thursday we had interviews with President and Hermana Avila. Can I just reiterate that they are literally the best. Everytime I am with them I just feel the love of the Savior. Hna. Avila interviewed us about our language goals...because we are supposed to set goals to help the Latins learn English. We talked about those goals for just a minute and then she gave us some counsel about going home. She said she started crying in the morning because she saw our pictures in the group going home and she has come to love us so much already that she doesn't want us to leave. She talked about marriage, of course, and actually mentioned several things that I just needed to hear. We were all crying by the end of the interview. I really love her.

Interviews with President were great, too. We talked about attributes of Christ and he asked me what attribute of Christ I have seen in my companion and I started BAWLING because I love Hna. Corriveau so much. haha. I have truly come to love her and I told president that I knew it was inspiration that we were together. The interviews were good and he gave me some good suggestions about enduring to the end and going home...although I didn't want to ask him all his consejos until my last interview with him! He is so nice, though. 

That night, we headed over to Amada and Francisco's house to teach about missionary work because that is all we needed to teach them before their baptism. We got there and Francisco says, "I have some bad news and some good news" and then told us that they decided not to get baptized. I literally thought he was joking because he likes to joke around with me. I was like...no seriously, let's start the lesson now! But then he said it again and I looked at my companion and asked her in English if he was being serious and she shook her head. I couldn't believe it. We had planned the baptism so perfectly, we had visited them EVERY DAY and we felt so strongly that they knew the church is true. I was so confused. We started asking them questions and trying to figure out what happened. They assisted a different church before so I felt like it had something to do with the other church.

I was asking Francisco what happened and he told us that the night before he was praying to really know if he should get baptized and he heard a voice in his head that said that we were deceiving him. I looked right at him, very hurt, and asked him if he really believed that. Then he proceeded to say that we weren't doing it on purpose, that we were deceived by the Book of Mormon and that the Book of Mormon is deceiving everyone. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Just a few days before we were talking about the Book of Mormon and how he knew it was true. We testified, we shared experiences and we testified some more. We told him that Satan ALWAYS tries to make us go astray before we do something good and this is what was happening. I had an impression to share a scripture in the Bible that talks about the fruits of the spirit and how they are feelings of peace, joy, love, etc. I asked him first how he felt when he had that impression that we were deceived. He said he felt anguish and sorrow. So then I shared that scripture from HIS Bible and testified that if it had been God speaking to him, he would NOT have felt those feelings. He would have felt peace and joy, love and humility. But even then he wouldn't change. Amada started saying that she was already baptized and didn't need to get baptized again and it literally was like the first day we met them. I felt like we had unbrainwashed them and then someone came back and undid everything we had worked so hard to do. 

We invited them to pray one more time and to tell us in the morning what they thought and we left. I seriously felt like someone had ripped out my heart and thrown it on the ground...but at the same time, I felt a peace. It was weird. I wasn't crying or felt horrible, I felt peace that Hna. Corriveau and I had done everything we could. We got home and called the Relief Society President to let her know and she told us something that made sense. She said that she knew they had felt the spirit and knew the church is true. There really was a change in them. But she thinks that someone from their other church must have gone and offered them some kind of economic help or something because it wouldn't just be that something changed everything that they had come to learn in one day. 

We called them on Friday and they still said no. They didn't want to get baptized. Well...we were sad, but we knew that we did what we needed to and we have hope that one day they will repent and get baptized. 

We did watch Meet the Mormons that night as a ward activity and although I felt sad that the baptism fell through...I felt SO STINKIN HAPPY TO BE MORMON! I honestly know, without any doubt, that being a member of this church and living the gospel is the ONLY WAY TO BE HAPPY!! Literally, I love the gospel. I told Francisco that if when I die, I come to find out that I really was deceived and this wasn't true, I will still be happy because I lived a good life. But good thing I DO KNOW THIS IS TRUE! There is no way...absolutely NO WAY I would be here on a mission if I didn't know this was true. I know it is true and I am happy about it. 

I guess these things happen. Satan is the worst but what can you do? I just need to keep working hard until the end to help others come to know that it is true, too. 

The work is real and I am grateful to be here. 

I also can't believe that next week will be the LAST TIME I WRITE YOU FROM MEXICO!!

Have a great week!

Love, 

Hermana Durham

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